I Sit in Silence

I keep forgetting. Then I remember and it jolts me back to reality. My first reaction is to cry but I’m struggling with that. I tell myself that I’m jaded and shouldn’t be effected by the loss of a corporate figurehead. After all, I didn’t even know him.

Then why do I feel like crying every time I remember he’s gone?

I was absolutely shocked when I saw this text from my father-in-law telling me it was a sad day for Apple with no more information. I’d been in one meeting after the next all day and hadn’t checked the newswires. But I knew. I knew for the longest time Steve Jobs was living on borrowed time. Anything having to do with the pancreas is absolutely unavoidable. Add that to cancer….and you know what happens. When I was asked what I thought about him stepping down, I said, “I’m surprised he didn’t do it a long time ago. He’s not well.”

My whole world revolves around the tools he created. It’s embedded in the language I speak every day. The lessons I teach are largely based on what he gave me. I can’t help but feel like crying. It’s only because I didn’t actually meet him that they don’t flow freely. All I am able to do is lose one tear, wipe it away, and acknowledge that I am surrounded by his products that changed the world. They didn’t just change the greater world, they changed mine. My business model was disrupted after the release of the iPhone and it looks completely different today than when I went into business. I am not saying it lightly when I say Apple products changed my life.

Not many people can say that they had a major effect on the way things work. He did. And for that, for the man that I never met, I sit in silence.

**May you and your family find peace in your passing. Please know we will all miss your vision, your guidance, and your presence. You are felt everywhere.